I realize it has been too long since I posted last. But the good news is that I had my surgery and it went very well and I am recovering well. I do still have some pain some times but no where near the pain I had before surgery. I did stop losing weight with the surgery hitting which is a bummer. I am about 30 lbs from my goal weight and I am hoping that now that I am getting back up to speed for working out (5 days a week 500 calories a day) that the pounds will eventually come off. I have started watching what I eat and tracking it all on My Fitness Pal (great app if you need one to use!) It tracks all my food and tells me how many calories to eat to lose pounds. I am back on a bike now (for the first 3 months after surgery all I did was walk) and that has helped me to work out more. I am excited moving forward and I am making future plans… I am headed back to school in the fall and I am working towards getting out of debt. New hope now that I am out of pain!
Hip surgery that is. It is what started this journey. Total Hip replacement. I am thoroughly excited and quite nervous but it is coming. Many times I have thought of putting it off until the pain was “worse” a total crippling pain but I feel like I know I have to do it why sit around waiting. So I trudge forward with getting rid of the pain that I do have and moving forward to a place where I can stop planning my day and trips around what I handle for pain. I look forward to hiking and dancing and trips. The start is coming it will still be a long road and I will keep up (better than I have been) with the posts.
I am in a waiting state now. The big rush is over I am in a time where life just is. Nothing new to report . I feel like I have already hit my place of life where this has become the normal way to eat and live. I now know when to get to the gym and how much to eat. It is a surreal place. I am not anywhere near my goal weight but I am down almost 40 pounds. It doesn’t seem real. I am two pant sizes down and look a whole lot better but I am still big and still have a ways to go. I know I just have to keep up to good fight and keep going even though I am ready to be at a point where I say I am done and can stop this diet. But it’s not a diet and this is going on for the rest of my life. Much harder than I envisioned. So I take each day just as a day and don’t think about the rest of my life just the next meal which is in a few hours and going to be very small!!
I now can eat whatever I want. The rules are to get a certain amount of protein and water. This is actually the hardest part. I am no longer being told what to eat and I have to do it for the rest of my life. I am down 31 pounds total and bumbling my way through what to eat. Food costs stayed the same because I am eating less but more expensive food. My crockpot has come in very handy and it provides enough food for two weeks I just have to eat the same thing every day! But it is a good starting point. This is a learning curve that has been a challenge more than not but will be worth it. That is what I remind myself I have a purpose for this. I also have been making it to the gym 5 days a week and started adding weights yesterday beginning slow at one day a week one rep of everything! It’s a baby step but a step all the same.
So they told me between weeks 3 – 6 my weight loss would stall… and here it is… It blows chunks!!! I think this is the part where people start to think “why the h-e-double hockey sticks did I do this???” I am eating nothing but protein and at that only 4 oz and I am losing NOTHING it’s not fair!!!!! (That was my two year old whiny voice right there!)
food is about the same
– chicken salad (with avocado because who just wants canned chicken and mayo??)
– pudding (because I can)
– black beans and ground beef (with a little cheese melted on it)
– Refried beans
– greek yogurt
Glad I don’t really get bored of food…. ok I get a little bored but what’s a girl to do, I don’t want to work at it 😉
I am drinking lots of water and working out (shooting for 5 times a week!)
I opted to stay with my grandmother for the first week after surgery. It was a nice oasis and great to get away. I read 3 books and drank all my meals. It was a bit brutal when grandma would ask if I could eat different things, and I had to keep telling her NO. But I made it through the first week with just eating protein shakes and resting. My reward was I lost 12 pounds…
These two photos are one week apart and I am so excited!! I went in for my one week appointment and they said I am healing well and things are going well. For the next two weeks I get to eat some foods…
– Refried Beans
– Greek Yogurt
– Egg Whites
– Sugar Free Pudding
– Cottage Cheese (which I don’t like)
But such sweet succulent meals I feel like they are amazing!!
So this is about 2 weeks out from surgery and it is but a memory now. Day of was very long I got there early (with no food from like 6pm the night before) and had to wait ALL DAY LONG. I didn’t go in until about 4:30 in the evening. Needless to say I was starving and going stir crazy having been checked in to the hospital since 8:30 that morning. We (grandma and I) played cards and watched TV and got bored of both. Grandma ended up leaving an hour and a half before I went in (to avoid traffic and night time driving)
Going in for surgery is always interesting. These days they keep you awake as they wheel you into the operating room. I don’t know if this is supposed to give you a sense of comfort or if they just want you to move yourself to the operating table. Either way it is kind of eerie. After getting onto the operating table I don’t remember too much they hooked me up to a bunch of different machines and I was out.
The best part of waking up from the surgery was I had a pain drip, every 10 mins I could administer pain meds myself. Apparently the surgery went well (so everyone says) and I was up and walking just a few short hours after. I did have to take swallows for the contrast xrays (nasty stuff) but with no leaks I was able to start drinking. I got an ounce of water and an ounce of ice chips every hour. How lucky was I?!?!?!
I am pretty sure I started losing weight right away as I hadn’t eaten any kind of food for over 24 hours.
My best friend came to visit me in the hospital and helped me take my first unsteady steps. But I was walking in no time and talking on the phone with my mom; and by that point it was 11 at night.
The next morning I got to start “eating” or rather drinking clear protein shakes (still only once ounce at an hour) but it was like manna from heaven. They had me up and walking every couple hours, to keep away the blood clots. By noon I was quite antsy to leave and worked on getting dressed all by myself and taken care of. It was such a relief to get picked up by my roommate and I was so excited to be leaving with my clear protein, pain medication, and breathing apparatus.
Today is the 4th of July!!! Happy Birthday America.
As I reflect on independence I also think of being a slave to things like my health and my body. So that makes me excited that this weekend is my first step in the process of independence from all of that. With every sip of clear liquid (yes two full days of only see through liquids) I try to remember that it is moving me closer. I rejoice as this is the beginning of my story of Independence.
I look forward to being free…
To walk, to play, to dance, to be who I want to be.
My first purchase towards surgery….after care. I can’t believe I am only two weeks away. Thoughts and feelings are excitement and fear not sure which is stronger but I am very thankful for the people in my life that keep reminding me that I can do this.
I am currently nervous about getting enough protein in my diet. I need 65-80 grams a day. I don’t even know what this is equivalent to which might be some of the fear. The other is bite size sounds ridiculous, I know, but they are supposed to be really small and I haven’t been practicing; which brings me to the next. Water not enough water is being consumed and when I do I take bug gulps and drink more than 2oz at a time. I need to get working!!